Oi, mis pantalones are flaming!

Lying—not telling the truth (according to google).

Lying—marked by or containing falsehoods (according to Merriam Webster.)

            Alright, these definitions are basically the same. I just wanted to do a cool intro, but it doesn’t really seem to be working out. Anyways, all my liars put your hands up! If your hand isn’t up, then you are a liar, thus your hand should be up. So by that logic, everyone is a liar no matter the size of the lie. And I am no different.

            When I was but a mere child, I told lies here and there, I told lies everywhere. But they were just tiny little fibs. I would tell my mom I cleaned my room when I actually just shoved everything in the back of the closet and prayed she was too tired to check. I told my older brother that it wasn’t me who ate his double fudge chocolate chip cookie (it was very delicious by the way). And I told my sister that I didn’t pull off the head of her Barbie doll.

Although, my favorite lie by far, has got to be the one I told my best friend in 3^rd grade. I still remember it because it was so ridiculous and obviously made up, but she just went along with it like a true MVP. So a little back story, I can do this really weird gravely deep voice that kind of sounds like Liam Neeson (if you’ve never heard it, it’s quite terrifying). It was a normal Tuesday afternoon in the playground when Candy (that’s my bestie, my bestie, my best friend, go best friend) and I were hanging out by the monkey bars. I showed her my Liam Nesson voice, and she was quite shocked and wanted to know how I did it. And of course, out tumbled the lies. I told her about how my father was developing this cool new drug that would allow you to change the octave of your voice and whatnot. I told her I was the first person to try this drug and it worked. And that was my very reasonable explanation for my deep Liam Neeson voice. I consider that to be my most elaborate lie of all time; there aren’t many of those these days though.

As I’ve grown up, I found myself lying less and less. The whole concept of lying just makes me extremely uncomfortable and guilty. I think one of the reasons for this change is because the lying format itself has changed. I used to lie about stealing cookies and candy but now lies would involve schoolwork, meetings, and work. And I don’t like to lie about any of those things because I am fully responsible for myself, and lying in regards to those things make me feel like a second grader. So I’d rather face the judgement than make crummy excuse for myself (which is still a work in progress to be honest). Another reason I don’t like to lie is because of how I feel afterwards. I tend to dwell a lot on things that went wrong in any way, and how that problem could’ve been avoided. Therefore, I beat myself up about lying pretty much all the time. And I prefer not to feel like crap, which is why I try not to lie about things.

But an area I consider a bit gray with lying is people. I don’t want to tell my friend she looks horrid in that dress but what kind of friend would I be if I let her strut around in a horrid dress?! I think that when it comes to lying about trivial things like this and whether or not mom’s new meatloaf recipe is the bomb.com are somewhat okay. I wouldn’t’ want to hurt someone’s feelings or minimize their opinion/excitement on something, so in these cases, I think a little fib is okay.